Asexuality Questionnaire #4.3: Community and Visibility

If you have not already done so, please stop off at the main questionnaire page for important information about the intent of these questionnaires.

Thank you for your interest, but this survey is now closed!  We are no longer accepting responses at this time.  If you’re curious, here’s what the questions were:

  1. Do you feel that it would be valuable for a celebrity or other famous person to come out as asexual?
  2. Do you feel that it would be valuable for a TV show or a movie to have an openly asexual character?
  3. Do you have any ideas for asexuality awareness/education/etc. that you would like to see someone create?  Have you ever tried to create them yourself?
  4. Do you feel like there is anything missing in the asexual community?
  5. Where would you like to see the asexual community in five years?  Ten years?  Twenty?
This survey is currently disabled.

Asexuality Questionnaire #4.1: Community and Visibility

If you have not already done so, please stop off at the main questionnaire page for important information about the intent of these questionnaires.

Thank you for your interest, but this survey is now closed!  We are no longer accepting responses at this time.  If you’re curious, here’s what the questions were:

  1. Have you ever participated in a “pride” event of some kind? If not, do you plan to do so in the future?  If you do not plan to do so, why not?
  2. Have you ever participated in an asexuality awareness or visibility event of some kind? If not, do you plan to do so in the future?  If you do not plan to do so, why not?
  3. Do you have any “ace pride” items that you display in public, such as t-shirts or other clothing, black rings, nail polish, bumper stickers, jewelry, signs, black-gray-white-purple items of some kind?  Has anyone ever commented on them?
  4. Do you feel it is important that you be a “visible asexual”, that is, someone who actively engages in asexuality awareness activities of some form?  If so, why?  If not, why not?  Do you want to be visible, but are afraid to be?
  5. What is your opinion of various symbols related to asexuality, such as the ace flag, the AVEN logo, the Ace of Spades, or the half-filled heart?
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Asexuality Questionnaire #4.2: Community and Visibility

If you have not already done so, please stop off at the main questionnaire page for important information about the intent of these questionnaires.

Thank you for your interest, but this survey is now closed!  We are no longer accepting responses at this time.  If you’re curious, here’s what the questions were:

  1. Do you participate in any online groups that are asexuality related?  If not, do you plan to do so in the future?  If you do not plan to do so, why not?
  2. Do you participate in any offline groups that are asexuality related? If not, do you plan to do so in the future?  If you do not plan to do so, why not?
  3. Have you ever been involved with an LGBT/GSM/Queer group in any way?  Did you reveal your asexuality to them?  Were they welcoming or not?
  4. Have you ever met another asexual in person?
  5. If you want increased visibility of asexuality, what do you want it for?
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Asexuality Questionnaire #3.3: Sex

IMPORTANT:  If you are under 18, skip this questionnaire.  Return to the main questionnaire page and answer some others instead.

If you have not already done so, please stop off at the main questionnaire page for important information about the intent of these questionnaires.

Thank you for your interest, but this survey is now closed!  We are no longer accepting responses at this time.  If you’re curious, here’s what the questions were:

  1. Do you have a libido?  How would you describe it?  Do you enjoy it?  Does it make you uncomfortable?  If you do not have a libido, explain why you do not feel that you have a libido.
  2. Do you experience arousal?  How would you describe it?  Do you enjoy it?  Does it make you uncomfortable?
  3. Have you ever felt “turned on” or “horny”?  How would you describe it?  Why do you not consider it to be an expression of sexual attraction?
  4. Have you ever had sex or participated in a sexual activity (or attempted to do either) as a “test” to prove or disprove your asexuality?  If you haven’t, have you ever considered it?  Did you feel it was important to “know for sure”?
  5. Do you participate or want to participate in any activity that is generally considered “sexual” by others?  Do you consider it “sexual”?
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Asexuality Questionnaire #3.2: Sex

IMPORTANT:  If you are under 18, skip this questionnaire.  Return to the main questionnaire page and answer some others instead.

If you have not already done so, please stop off at the main questionnaire page for important information about the intent of these questionnaires.

Thank you for your interest, but this survey is now closed!  We are no longer accepting responses at this time.  If you’re curious, here’s what the questions were:

  1. Have you ever wanted to have sex or participate in a sexual activity for some reason?  What was that reason?
  2. Have you ever been in what you would consider to be a sexual relationship with someone else?  Describe what that was like, being asexual.  Have you ever experienced problems in a sexual relationship because of your asexuality?
  3. Have you ever experienced non-sexual, “more-than-platonic” physical contact with another person, such as hugging, kissing, or cuddling?  Do you enjoy it?  If you never have, would you be willing to do so at some point in the future?
  4. Have you ever experienced sexual contact with another person, such as intercourse, oral sex, anal sex, mutual masturbation, other genital stimulation, breast play, or frottage?  Do you enjoy it? If you haven’t, would you be willing to do so in the future?
  5. Does it bother you if other people have sexual thoughts about you?
This survey is currently disabled.

 

Asexuality Questionnaire #3.1: Sex

IMPORTANT:  If you are under 18, skip this questionnaire.  Return to the main questionnaire page and answer some others instead.

 

If you have not already done so, please stop off at the main questionnaire page for important information about the intent of these questionnaires.

Thank you for your interest, but this survey is now closed!  We are no longer accepting responses at this time.  If you’re curious, here’s what the questions were:

  1. What are your thoughts on sex?
  2. Did discovering you were asexual change your outlook on sex?
  3. Did you have sex or participate in a sexual activity before you discovered you were asexual?  What was it like?
  4. Did you have sex or participate in a sexual activity after you discovered you were asexual?  What was it like?
  5. Are you repulsed by sex or sexual topics or experience an aversion to sex or sexual topics?  If so, describe what it’s like.  How did you first discover that you were repulsed or averse?  Did you ever attempt to overcome your repulsion or aversion?
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Asexuality Questionnaire #2.3: Coming Out

If you have not already done so, please stop off at the main questionnaire page for important information about the intent of these questionnaires.

Thank you for your interest, but this survey is now closed!  We are no longer accepting responses at this time.  If you’re curious, here’s what the questions were:

  1. Have you ever been outed against your will?
  2. Had you previously come out as some other sexual orientation or otherwise indicated that you were something other than asexual?  Did this lead to people doubting your asexuality or questioning your honesty when you came out as asexual?
  3. Have you ever pretended not to be asexual or otherwise hidden your asexuality at some point after coming out, in order to fit in?

This survey is currently disabled.

Asexuality Questionnaire #2.2: Coming Out

If you have not already done so, please stop off at the main questionnaire page for important information about the intent of these questionnaires.

Thank you for your interest, but this survey is now closed!  We are no longer accepting responses at this time.  If you’re curious, here’s what the questions were:

  1. Have you lost any friends or other close relationships because of coming out?
  2. Do your parents or other close relatives know?  If so, how did they react?  If not, why haven’t you told them?
  3. Did people believe you when you came out?
  4. Have you ever had another person react positively to you being asexual?
  5. Have you ever had another person react negatively to you being asexual?
This survey is currently disabled.

Asexuality Questionnaire #2.1: Coming Out

If you have not already done so, please stop off at the main questionnaire page for important information about the intent of these questionnaires.

Thank you for your interest, but this survey is now closed!  We are no longer accepting responses at this time.  If you’re curious, here’s what the questions were:

  1. Have you come out?  If so, why did you come out and what was it like?  If not, why not, and do you think you ever will?  Are you out to some people, but not others?
  2. How do you describe your asexuality to another person?
  3. Have you had any positive coming out experiences?
  4. Have you had any negative coming out experiences?
  5. What advice would you have for someone choosing to come out?
This survey is currently disabled.

Living Alone

Although this is for the Carnival of Aces theme about age and asexuality, it’s not really about age or asexuality.  At least not directly.  Instead, it’s about something that comes up over and over when younger aces talk about growing up:  The fear of living alone.

I’m in my thirties.  I live alone.  I’ve lived alone for almost nine years now and let me tell you a secret:  It’s not scary.  Know why?  Because it’s awesome, that’s why.

Know what’s in my closet?  My clothes. Know who gets the blankets at night?  Me. Know what’s on TV?  Whatever I want to watch. Know who uses all the hot water in the shower in the morning?  I do. Know who gets to use the car tomorrow?  No one, because it’s Sunday and I don’t feel like going anywhere.

I live alone in a four bedroom house.  Know what’s in one of the bedrooms in this house?  It’s not a guest bedroom that has to be maintained for the in-laws.  It’s not a playroom for a rabble of rugrats.  It’s full of video games.  Nothing but video games.  I have video games from systems you’ve never heard of.  Do you know why?  Because it’s my house and I want a room full of video games.

I didn’t have to get permission when I decided to staple a hundred plastic plates to my wall to make a gigantic Tetris hallway.  I didn’t have to convince anyone when I decided to replace some lightswitches or put up some shelves.  I didn’t have to form a selection committee when I decided to put waterfall pictures on my stairs.  I don’t have to ask for forgiveness when I take over the dining room table for an art and/or science project that has no rational explanation.

(And speaking of the dining room table:  It’s cheap.  It’s actually a folding table.  But no one complains about it, because there’s no one here to complain.)

It’s wonderful that there’s no one here to stop me.  If I want to buy a copy of The Trouble With Tribbles on CED VideoDisc, even though I don’t have a VideoDisc player and no one even has any idea what a VideoDisc is, no one will tell me no.  If I think that it’s a good idea to try to build an air conditioner to draw up cool air from my crawlspace using a fan, a cardboard sheet, some ventilation tubing, and a whole lotta duct tape, no one will tell me no.  If I want Froot Loops for lunch, no one will tell me no.  If I want to lock myself away for five days while I build a fully autonomous real world implementation of “Robot Finds Kitten”, no one will tell me no. If I want to put pink flamingos, a garden gnome, and a random survey benchmark in my backyard, no one will tell me no.  If I want to replace the bulbs in the bathroom fixture with red, green, and blue bulbs so that I get white light, but awesome colored shadows, no one will tell me no. If I want to hang out in my PJs until 1 PM, then go naked for the rest of the day, no one will tell me no.  (But I don’t want to do that, because I’d probably just get cold.)

You know what I had for dinner last night?  Pepperoni pizza.  Know what I’ll have for dinner tonight?  Pepperoni pizza.  Know what I’ll have for dinner tomorrow night?  Pepperoni pizza.  Know why?  I like pepperoni pizza.  There’s no negotiating about menu variety or freezer space, and there’s no demands that I go to an overpriced restaurant that I hate.

And it’s not just inside the house where being single comes in handy.  I like to go on vacation.  So far, I’ve been to two decommissioned nuclear reactors and one atomic bomb detonation site.  I’ve seen the world’s largest frying pan, a life-sized statue of Yoda, and the landfill in the desert where Atari buried thousands of copies of the ET game.  I’ve stood on a corner in Winslow, Arizona, I’ve gone where the streets have no name in Joshua Tree, and I’ve climbed underneath the bridge on the muddy banks of the Wishkah.  And I haven’t had to justify any of it.  I go where I want and stay as long as I like.  I don’t complain if I have to have spray cheese and crackers for dinner because I’m camping someplace that’s a hundred miles from a restaurant.  I don’t have to deal with anyone getting hungry or getting bored or getting tired or needing a pit stop ten minutes after I just bought gas.  Know how many outlet malls or art museums or roadside fruit stands I’ve had to stop at?  None.

Of course, it’s not all sunshine and lollipops in this world.

All the chores around the house are mine to do.  I can’t weasel out of doing the dishes or the laundry, and the overgrown jungle of a backyard is silently mocking me for failing to keep it under control.  There’s no one else around who I can get to kill the spiders for me, either.

As much as I like going on vacation, let’s face it, places like the Willamette Valley are much better if you sleep the whole way through them, and it’s really hard to do that if you’re driving. (Although, it would be a lot easier to do if it weren’t for that slight curve near Eugene…)  Also, there was that one cave in California where I decided that it was dangerous to go alone, so I didn’t go inside, even though it’s supposed to have an amazing wall of ice in it.

If I get sick, I can’t lay in bed all day while someone waits on me.

If someone has to call the mortgage company or make reservations or otherwise use that terrifying contraption known as a telephone, it has to be me.

If I go into a store, there’s no one else who can deflect the pushy salespeople.

And if I somehow get trapped in the crawlspace when trying to rig up that air conditioner I was talking about, there’s no one who’ll rescue me and I’ll die down there and no one will ever find my body.

Perhaps the worst part about living alone is that I don’t have anyone to help me load Ikea furniture into my car.  Have you ever tried to fill a Prius with flat pack bookcases all by yourself?  Let me tell you, it ain’t easy.

So basically, I guess what I’m saying is that you shouldn’t be so worried about ending up alone, because being alone is what you make of it.  Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got to go mount a giant pixel-art mural of a level from Super Mario Bros. on my wall.

(And no one will tell me no.)